Bobby and I started 2020 in the most joyous way possible watching Marriage Story. Woof. You know how they say, what you do on the first day of a new year leads the rest of the year. I HOPE NOT. To be honest, the day did not go better from there. Our kids were tired of being with us and with each other and at home and just honestly breathing. We took a walk and ran into friends. Bo bit me twice while at lunch. Like really? I've truly only ruined like 10 dinners during my time with Bobby- I really destroyed dinner that night. If that's going to be my whole year, I'm in trouble.
It was one of those days that when I laid my head down, I was happy it was over. I just remember New Years Days of past when Bobby and I binged watched the beginning of The West Wing and ordered Chinese. Those were the days. But maybe, these are the new days. It kind of felt good to have no pressure to have a resolution to stick to and to let me down in sixteen days.
Here's the deal, I didn't feel like I needed a resolution this year. For the last year, I have worked incredibly hard on myself. I am nowhere near the person that I hope to be each day, but I am making baby steps everyday. I've drank more water, walked more steps, stopped to really take in the little moments with my family- but I have so much more of all of this to go. I couldn't add one more thing to my already crowded plate. So I'm committing to Sober January right now and we'll see if something else happens in February.I've decided that January 1st doesn't have to be different than December 31st. I'm not putting pressure on myself anymore. Long ago, I stopped putting pressure on the Eve and now, it's about time that I stop putting pressure on the Day. Also, new changes don't have to happen on Day One of a month, year, or week. They can happen whenever you need or want them to. (Remember this, Kate).
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